FK and Fight
by FanaticFaberrittanaFanfiction
Summary: You watch them, they're so toxic, with a jealous glint in your eyes and concern. The concern over takes the jealousy every time you see a bruise on her arm. Pezberry. One sided! Faberry
1. Fuck and Fight

AN: Another one of those one shots. Second person. Enjoy warm and review hot.

0000

You watch them, they're so toxic, with a jealous glint in your eyes and concern. The concern over takes the jealousy every time you see a bruise on her arm, finger prints around her neck, and you're even concerned about the other when she walks in with black eyes and bloody knuckles. No one seems to notice, or they just don't care, but I notice. I notice when one is limping and the other is smug and vice verse. When she came home from visiting NYADA you wanted her to run to you but instead she runs into the arms of Santana, the girl that broke her heart before she left. You watched them kiss for 30 minutes before she finally acknowledged you and the rest of the glee club that day. Now you sit with her, in her room, watching her get dressed and you study the bruises. More hand prints and scratches, They look fresh.

"Rachel."

"Hmm?" She turns looking at you pulling on a tank top.

You stare, feeling like a pervert, "What's with the bruises?"

"Oh." She looks over her own body, "It's nothing."

You don't buy it, "I don't buy that."

"Awh are you worried?" She walks up to you and places her hands on your shoulders kissing your forehead.

"It looks like you've been getting your ass kicked."

She nods, "I have."

The glint in her eyes worry you as she walks over, bending down to pull on her shorts. You watch and she sees you. She knows you like her, she figured out when she learned how much a metro pass is. Now she teases you and flirts but is never direct. You turn your head to the side not looking at her due to pure annoyance. You're serious and she's just flirting with you.

"I like it Quinn."

You look at her, "What?"

"This." Rachel trails fingers over her abs showing a bruise, "I really like it when Santana is rough with me."

You shake your head, "That's...that's crazy. It looks like it hurts."

"I like it Quinn." She walks up straddling you, "A lot."

You stare, "What are you doing?"

"Seducing you."

You stare at her, you stare as if she is insane. Santana is gonna kill you when she finds out. There is no if about it. All Rachel and Santa do is fight and fuck. Fuck and fight. Rachel will tell her out of spite and you will be buried 5 minutes after. She starts kissing your neck and you know you're going to be giving in soon.

"Should we do this?"

"Why shouldn't we?"

"Santana."

Rachel looks at you, "I want you to take me."

She gets up and starts stripping off her clothes and just watch, your heart pounds and you know you're going to hell as soon as you stand and start undressing with her. Hopefully hell won't be so bad.

0000

When you wake up you realize she left you and a note. You feel like a whore when you read it.

_'Date night with the lady. Lock the door on your way out.'_

You get up and get dressed, you'll shower at home. The smell of sex sill hangs in the air. You leave and awkwardly say bye to her parents, hoping they didn't hear. The drive home is slow and nerve wrecking, you see Rachel walking and pull over abruptly and open the door. Nothing is said as she gets in staring at the dashboard. You drive because there is nothing else you can do. You want to speak but you keep remembering you had sex with this girl. And on date night. You cheated again. What would you get now? God this was cruel beyond belief.

Reaching her house you sit there and she looks at you. You smile and she just stares taking your hand.

"You have no idea what you mean to me."

You stare, "I don't..."

"Go wash your hands Quinn."

She gets out and close the door. You stare at your hand and bite your bottom lip. This doesn't make sense. The blood crusted in your finger tips. You get a baby, mono, and virginity. How did this happen? You get out and follow, she left the door open. You close it and go up the steps into her room. You look around and she's not there so you go to the bed pulling the covers back, spots of red. None of it makes sense and you feel like your going to throw up. You fucked a virgin like it was one of those more experienced girls under you. You sit in the bed putting your fingers in your hair. When the bed dips you look over your shoulder at Rachel, in her underwear, you move before she can touch you and she lies on her side.

"How are you a virgin?"

Rachel stares, "Never been penetrated."

"But you and Santana, all you do is fight and fuck."

She laughs, "There is a lot of touching. Some heavy petting and dry humping. You really have no idea how much you mean to me. I always wanted you to be my first...my everything. But for some reason I fell in love with Santana but you...I still couldn't not think of you so I wanted to have you just one time. The first time."

You don't know what to say. You've never felt so used and by a friend. A friend dating your best friend. Hell is not going to be a warm greeting.

"Rachel..."

You get out the bed and she stares at you, she looks lost and it hurts but you don't get back in the bed. Your head is running a million miles a minute. Turning you leave the room, noticing the way she doesn't try to stop you and just cuts the light on her nightstand.

When you get outside you see Santana leaning against her car watching you. Santana stops cleaning her nails and gives you a cold look then a smirk appears on her face.

"You always have to have what you're not suppose to. Don't you?"

You push your hair back, "I didn't know she was a virgin."

"You couldn't say no, could you?" Santana smirks.

You're starting to get confused because she's not hitting you. But she walks closer and kisses you on the cheek rubbing the other side of your face.

"Thanks Q, I was getting sick off humping and hitting. Now I get to do what I do the best."

This is when you see the split lip and black eye on her face and remember the bruised knuckles on Rachel's hands. Santana moves back and winks at you going into the house. You just stand there then you see Rachel's light come on so you look up. Their shadows show movements of an argument and pushing until Rachel is against the glass. Santana stands in front of her and starts kissing her neck looking down at you and waves her hand before moving Rachel and closing the blinds.

0000

You lie in bed, complete silence, no music playing and the TV is off. But all you can think about is how you were just a pawn in their game. Rachel needed her perfect first and Santana needed a sex life. You close your eyes tightly holding in the angry tears ready to fall. There is a tap at the door, you really don't want your mom to come in now so you say nothing. But you hear it open so you stiffen not moving and even when the bed dips you don't move in case your mom wants to talk because you'll start crying and over share again. That's how you ended up coming out to your mom.

"Quinn?"

"Rachel?" You don't move as she pulls her front to your back.

"Santana and I started arguing again. I just want to sleep."

You say nothing and let her hug into you. After ten minutes you turn over and put your arm around her waist, she opens her eyes and looks at you so you kiss her nose, then cheek, and then lips.

She sighs smiling, "Some times it's nice to be held. Just like this."

"I'd hold you forever."

"I know Quinn." She kisses you, "But you can't give me what I need."

You say nothing else and fall asleep.

0000

When you wake in the morning she's gone, giving you another note about Santana picking her up. She's right. You can't give her what she wants. She wants to fight and fuck. You just want to love her.

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AN: Angst. Hope you enjoyed.


	2. Wishing

AN: Active Story slow updates but I've been kinda obsessed with this. Have you ever written or read a one shot and wondered what happens to the characters because it's just open ended. It won't be very long.

BTW FF deleted it because the title was inappropriate. Bull shit but whatever.

0000

You sit in Santana's car, ignoring the way she bitches about Quinn. She just wants to get hit in the face, maybe not the face but you're close to hitting her there anyway. She stops the car and grabs your hair. You hold in the moan threatening to erupt from deep within. Your heart is pounding and now you're practically panting. She knows how to push you, she push you so hard. Santana pulls you close and kisses you but you're still not in the mood so you don't respond and push away lightly.

"No Santana."

"Why not? Is this about Quinn?"

You shake your head, "I'm tired."

"We did this for you." Santana the steering wheel, "I let you do this. I let her be your first."

You just sit there. Shes mad now. She wants to hit you. But she won't.

"Get out my car."

"Santana."

"I mean it. Get out!"

"Are you serious? Fuck you. I'm not getting out."

She punches the steering wheel, "I said get out. Ask Quinn to take you."

"Fine." You get out. "I'll let her have me and then take me home!"

You slam the door and Santana speeds off, fully annoyed now. Not like you care. You're sick of her bitching about Quinn. As you walk further down the street toward her house she speeds back up and leans over opening the door for you. Staring you finally get in the car and settle into the seat putting on your seat belt and she starts driving toward her house. You let out an annoyed sigh but she turns the radio up ignoring you.

Sitting there you stare out the window, eyes glued to Quinn's home. She's such a beautiful person. You love her. Correction, you wish you loved her. You wish she could hold you every night and kiss you softly. Some times you wish for her but she won't come. You've hurt her. But wishing is just that. Wishing.

When the two of you reach the house you take out your spare key and go into her home and go down to her room. She's behind you closing the front door then the basement door. You get into the bed kicking off your shoes. She crawls in and hugs you close. You wish it was this way always this way. But it would bore you and she would cheat. You like the way it works. It feels your need for want and her want to be needed. You fight, not screaming either. The first time you hit her and she tackled you, that's when she learned your secret. You moaned and bucked into her. She slammed down and grabbed your neck, this is when you remember the fight changing from being a fight. You started moaning louder and she gripped your neck tight while grinding into you. Your skirt partially ripped off your body. When you came you passed, when you woke you were in Santana's room wearing an oversized shirt. You felt your neck, it was raw and probably going to be bruised, your could feel the bruises forming. When she came back into the room and got into the bed, she told you that were now hers. You nodded and broke up with Finn the next morning.

Now you let her kiss your knuckles, your neck, and lips. She;s trying to sweeten you up before she goes to sleep. She doesn't want you to be gone before she wakes up. You won't leave her. You couldn't if you tried.

00000

When you finally wake up she's watching TV and playing with your hair. You sit up and go into the bathroom.

"Rach?"

"What?"

"What are you doing?"

"Peeing. Then brushing my teeth."

"We need to talk."

You sigh but you don't answer until you finish and exit. Toothbrush in hand.

"I don't like you with Quinn."

"Santana, it happened once and only once."

"But she loves you." Santana starts channel surfing, "I don't see why. Maybe she won't when she realizes you used her. "

Your jaw tightens and you ignore the way she smirks or you try. She stands up walking toward you. She never stops until she gets what she wants. You're going to give in because you've been dying to hit her since this morning. She steps closer and you push her but she grabs your hair and you don't get to do much more. She grabs your neck tightly and you moan. The look in her eyes is dangerous. Violent. Lustful. And a flicker you haven't seen in a while, possession. She wants to claim you again. The same look she hand when you broke up with Finn and walked over grabbing the back of your neck lightly to lead you away. You were just as lost in those eyes then as you are now and you know it. She knows it. Everyone knows it. Your dads know was the hardest on you.

When she told you to stop talking and you listened, they stared and questioned the fresh finger bruises around your forearm. But you said nothing because you were told not to speak so they were going to call the cops until she tapped you and you told them it was a simple fight and Santana got hers. They believed you because your girlfriend was sporting a black eye. But eventually they learned the truth. Walking in on Santana choking you with your hand down her pants and her thigh pressed against you. It was a mess. You lived with your mom for a while.

She's picked you up and pinned you down and the look has turned to something scary. You feel sick because you know you're getting wetter instead of scared. You like to think its because you know she would never hurt you. But you don't know that and it turns you on not knowing if this will be the time she ignores the safe word. It turns you on knowing that she is never going to let you go. That she is never going to let you leave her.

"I bought something while Quinn was deflowering you."

You glare, "Stop talking about." You take a hand full of her hair.

"Damn it..." She moans. "Make me." She rips off your panties and rubs against you.

You feel something new, "What's that?"

"What does it feel like?"

She moves again and you know exactly what it is. She's been wanting to buy one. But you wouldn't let her since you were a virgin. Now you're not and you know she loves it.

"Can I use it?" She kisses you softly, breaking into the caring girlfriend role quickly.

You nod kissing her back, "Yes."

The look returns instantly and damn it all to hell and back you love it. She pulls down her shorts showing the silicon extension. You're grateful it's smaller than the one she originally wanted. When she first showed you, with perverted excitement, you threatened to dump her. You're glad she listened. You think.

She opens your legs with a smug smile, "Look at what I do to you."

She runs her fingers through your slick folds, making you moan, then shows you. You try to glare but she rubs against you.

"Putting it in now."

It's different being warned. You guess it's because this your first time with one of those. You're grateful. You think.

She slides in slowly making your toes curl. Her thrust are deep and slow, her body is angled as she uses her hands for support. You grip her forearms, digging your nails in as she finally speeds up, pushing deeper. When she buries her face in your neck going faster, slamming harder, and you dig your nails into her back. She bites down because you may have drawn blood.

She smells like pineapples, it's so funny to you because she hates pineapples. And she only smells that way during sex, but you love it. She smells so good and taste even better. Her forearm presses into your throat. Your eyes roll back she's showing no mercy. You love it. You think.

"She won't love you the way I do." She pushes harder, "Look at me." You look and she's staring though your eyes and into your soul, "You're mine Rachel. And no one will ever..." She thrust harder, "Take you."

You nod because it's true. She's got you around the neck, hand squeezing as you both get closer every second. It's different each time, the climax. You've only passed out once. Once you cried, it was a good cry but that scared her. Now you cling to her desperately gasping and shaking. You're biting her shoulder so hard you can taste cooper.

She goes into the bathroom and you move out the wet spot. You lie there catching your breath, rubbing your neck, and shaking. She rejoins you, well she makes you move so she can lie down and you snuggle in close.

"You're mine Rachel. I love you more than anyone ever could." She kisses you, "I'll anyone that gets in the way."

You look at her, she's so serious that it's kinda scaring you. You love it. She touches your face and kisses you, this is when your phone rings. It's Quinn singing 'Hey Jude' with a music box. You remember recording it the night you came home. She glares but you make no move to answer. Answering would cause another fight and honestly you are quite tired. Santana rises and grabbed your phone answering it and put it in your direction. You have to speak.

"Rachel?"

"Hey." Your voice is horse.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah...can we talk later?"

She sighs, "Is she there?"

"Yes."

You look at Santana's death grip on the phone.

"Rachel, I love you. I know it didn't mean anything to you but it meant everything to me."

You don't say anything until Santana nudges you.

"Quinn..."

"I know you love me too."

"I don't."

"Yes you do. You're so frustrating." She groans, "I heard you talking in your sleep."

You stiffen because Santana is watching you.

"You wish for us Rachel."

Santana laughs, "Quinn let it go. She's mine."

You cringe as she laughs more before hanging up. You're so tired right now. You stand and go to shower. Santana says nothing but you know she's mad at you. You don't care. You just want to shower and go home. Locking the bathroom door you go and start the water, tuning out Quinn's ring tone starting up again. You do wish for her. You wish to be held by her and kiss her. You wish you could love her. But that's all it is. Wishing.


	3. Owned

AN: Answering reviews

Anon: Stupid is a relative term. But yeah Rachel is that idiotic. That incredibly idiotic. She has her reasons.

Mkc1989: Idiocy is a disease that destroys us all. Love makes us moronic fools who continue to act like such even when they shouldn't. Quinn should move on and maybe she will. But one sided desires can make you blind to what has really happened to you. Nothing in this story will be a simple logical relationship.

Broadwaybound2016: Glad you love it. Enjoy the update below.

Lightblue-Nymphadora: I hope terrifying is a good thing.

Warning: I got a PM saying this was offensive. I want to say there is no rape in this story, Rachel just thinks a lot and about a lot. Santana would never ever rape her in any form or fashion. And I would never write rape.

0000

You ignore Rachel when she leaves, after jerking her phone out of your hand. No goodbye. No I love you. But she ignores you too. She had put on your old PE shorts and one of your wife beaters too. You know she's tired and mad so you kind of expect her to leave in a huff. You're pretty sure she has your car keys as well and that, that shit pisses you off. Because now you have to borrows your mom's car if you wanna go anywhere and she's gonna be super pissed about your girlfriend stealing your car again. And she's gonna be super pissed when she sees the finger prints around your arms. You know you're gonna get bitched at and it's all Rachel's fault. Okay so maybe you were almost unnecessarily cruel to Quinn. Almost. You didn't have any reason to be cruel but you were. You allowed Quinn to take your girl...and you can't stop wondering what the fuck Rachel sees in her.

You've always been jealous of Quinn. She gets everything she wants. Every person. And this one time you beat her you let her win again because it's what Rachel wants. Everything is what Rachel wants in your relationship. As long as she's happy you'll do it and she knows that. You think. You think she does. She should. You let Quinn fuck her. God you feel like a moron. Why would you do that? Oh yeah...Rachel. The reason for breathing.

Getting up you go to shower, you always let Rachel shower first because you know how important being clean is to her. You're surprised she didn't shower the second she got home, well to your house. You wanted to say something because she smelled like Quinn. But you didn't you just held her as she slept, she doesn't know you do that. She thinks you just sit around and watch TV or turn away from her. But you do all the things you know she wants. You like holding her hand, kissing her, buying her things, singing to her, and holding her. You hope she likes it. But hell she probably doesn't like it when you do it. She never mentions it. She only mentions how she likes when you leave marks. She tells you she loves you. But she says nothing else. You hate it. Though you use to threaten to kick her ass for talking, but it explains a lot now when she kept talking after your threats of violence. Or how she never took off running when you tried to attack and would just stand there either screaming or watching you get held back.

The warm water feels good against your skin. It rolls over the bruises over bruises, some fading and some fresh. At least she stayed away from your face this time, you have to stay away from her neck neck time and arms. Anywhere visible. She's gonna be auditioning soon and then famous and you don't want to be the abusive girlfriend. If you're still the girlfriend. You pray she doesn't replace you with Quinn, because someone would die. No hesitation. You would murder one of them or try. More than likely you would just beat the shit out of Quinn.

0000

After your show and change into black black short shorts and a tank top, you don't care about bruises, it makes you look fucking bad ass. You walk into the living room and takes the keys.

"Mami I'm taking your car."

"Where are you taking it?" She looks up, "What happened to you mi hija?"

You look at your arms, "Playing fighting with Rachel. She's stronger than she looks."

"Hmm, where is your car? Did she take it?"

"I let her borrow it."

"Mi hija I don't like you lying to me. That little girl causes nothing but problems."

You nod, she use to like Rachel but no where near as much as she likes Brittany. You never came home crying over Brittany the way you do Rachel and you sure as hell didn't look like you've been fighting Mike Tyson. So you kiss her on the cheek and you leave before she can continue. Getting in the car you have no idea where you're going you but you know where you'll end up. It's always the same, you ride around for an hour, refill your mom's tank and then you end up in the driveway of your girl Rachel. Always. Never ends. Her parents are home but you don't really care. They'll leave soon after you get there anyway. But you see another car as well. You see Quinn's car and you wonder when she got here. You get up and walk over to the door about to knock when you hear the Berry men laughing so you back up and look toward the window, luckily out of sight thanks to a bush, and you see Quinn sitting on the couch talking to them effortlessly and Rachel is beside her looking on in boredom and you smirk. See you have nothing to worry about. Rachel is your girl. Not Quinn's. You walk to the door and knock. You use a specific knock and within seconds the door is opened by your girl, who looks happy to see you. Still tired looking but happy. You lean in and kiss her lightly.

"Sirs."

They ignore you and you shrug it off nodding toward the door and Rachel close it. She starts to pull you up the steps but you shake your head and walk over to the recliner sitting down. Rachel walks up sitting in your lap and leans against you as your arm snakes around her waist.

"Well let's get going honey. Dinner party."

"Right. We love you Rachel. Quinn it was a pleasure to see you as always."

The men leave ignoring you again and you just roll your eyes then look at Quinn.

"What are you doing here Quinn?"

"Seeing my friend. Checking on her."

You look at Rachel, "Are you okay?"

"Yes."

"She's fine. You can leave now."

Quinn glares, "Rachel, are you okay?"

You grip Rachel's knee and your girl looks at you then looks at you and then looks down getting up out your lap and you go up to Quinn putting her hand out.

"I'll walk you to the car."

Quinn stands, jaw clenched, "Look at me."

"Don't." You watch, "Quinn save yourself the trouble. Rachel."

Rachel looks at you annoyed, probably because now you're just showing off. You want Quinn to know what she's up against and there is nothing wrong with that. But you're going to hear about it soon. You look at Rachel who opens the door looking at Quinn.

"I'm not going anywhere. You're going to get sick of this and then..." She looks at you, "I'll have you as all mine."

She kisses your girl so softly that you hear Rachel whimper before Quinn walks out slamming the door. Your eyes immediately fall on your brunette girl as she stares at the couch expectantly and you move quickly lying there. She gets on the couch and presses her back to your front as you put an arm around her.

"How long was she here?"

"She was here when I got home and was still here when I woke up."

You kiss the back of her head, "How do you feel about her?"

"She's a great friend." Rachel turns looking at you.

You look in her eyes, "How do you really feel about her?"

"I told you Santana. Stop talking about it." She turns and looks at the TV, "Just stop."

When she does this you wonder who is really in control here. Is it you or is it Rachel? Who is really getting slapped, punched, and choked? Rachel is walking around with the most visible bruises but you, you feel so empty right now. Yeah, Quinn bores her but you know...one day she'll wake up and Quinn will stop boring her. You chew on your bottom lip and start getting irritated. You don't like it when Rachel blows you off because she doesn't like what you're saying.

"You wish a lot."

"So?"

"I wish too."

"I'm not in the mood."

You groan, "Look at me."

She turns quickly and gives you her full attention without hesitation and you kiss her lightly, placing your hand on her cheek.

"Do you love me?"

She nods, "I love you more than I love anyone in this world. I would give up anything for you. Anything."

"Prove it."

She kisses you slowly, softly, and deeply. You hold her close returning the kiss trying not to turn it into something else. You're surprisingly not in the mood right now. When she breaks the kiss you look at her and your eyes fall to her neck.

"Does it ever hurt?"

She touches her neck, "Only later on. Some times it hurts to swallow but that's directly after."

"Do you want me to lighten up?"

"Why would I want that?"

You look at her, "Your neck is pretty bad right now."

"It's been worse. That's why we stopped real angry sex. Remember?"

Boy did you ever. You and Rachel started to argue about you kissing Brittany goodbye at graduation. You argued in the car, while you changed, at the graduation party, and when you finally went to your house (no one was home) it all came to head. You started to really argue, she screamed at you and threw whatever she could get your hands on. She finally punched you in mouth and you snapped grabbing her around the neck slamming her into the wall. But Rachel will always be a fighter, she kept swinging punching your body and kicking you until you let go and then she tackled you, much like the first time learned her secret instead it was you who tackled her, and she was crying while she slapped you over and over again. Until she leaned down kissing you. That night she almost gave you her virginity, in the heat of the moment, but you stopped right before entering because you were made, you wanted to hurt her, and you wanted her to love it. But right then you fell in love with the bruised girl under you with her eyes closed and head thrown back. Right then you put a ban on real angry sex.

"Rachel, do you not trust me the way you trust Quinn?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Why was it so important for her to be your first?"

Rachel looks at you, "I always felt like I was suppose to be with Quinn but I fell in love with you. I never stopped thinking what it would be like with her...so I wanted my first time to be with her...just the first time."

"The first time is suppose to mean something."

"Who was your first?"

You stare at her intently, "Puck."

"Did it mean anything?"

"No."

She nods and then snuggles into you, for the first time while facing you, and inhales deeply.

"I love the way you small Tana. I love the way you taste. The way you hold me when you think I'm sleep and how you whisper sweet things to me. Tell me you want to marry me. I love when you grab me and control me, possess me and own me. I love everything about you. I trust you because I know you would never hurt me. I like to think you would never hurt me."

You stare at her, "I wouldn't. I know the safe word Rach. I know when I'm going too far..."

She smiles and kisses you again again.

"But it turns me on. I love you Tana. Quinn was just a chapter I needed to finish. You are who I love." She kisses you again and turns looking at the TV, "You don't have to worry about Quinn."

You nod because you want to believe her. You need to believe that Quinn means nothing to her, or would go crazy. So you ignore that slight second of hesitation when Quinn demanded Rachel look at her and she almost did, even after you said don't. And you choose to ignore the way she held in tears and a flinch when Quinn slammed the door. And as her phone vibrates you choose to ignore Quinn's name on the screen. Along with the text message. You'll do all these things because she is yours. You like to think you own her but in reality she owns you.

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AN: Answering reviews

Snowdrop: Glad you get it. Hope this was soon enough for you =]

Thanks for the reviews and alerts. This won't be long. Maybe 6 chapters to get my mojo following on my other stories.

Also this chapter title is totally dedicated to 'Owned' pezberry slave fic


	4. Satan laughing in your ear

AN: Will answer reviews at the bottom.

I kinda love the mixed response to this story. And it is faberry but pezberry is the relationship. I could just switch the couples back and forth until I decide the end game. But I won't because I'm lazy. If the end game changes then I'll change the couples.

0000

You love band practice because you can get lost in the music that you create with Puck and Finn. Finn banging on the drums and Puck playing the guitar. You singing, your voice is a lot stronger than it use to be. You can hit different notes, sing louder, raspier, and you have more confidence. You've been wanting to learn the guitar but you can only play a few chords and you are pretty bad ass on the drums but Finn is a pouter when someone else plays his drums. You like the dynamic of your group. You love the name, 'Losers in Reverse', and part of you loves knowing there will be groupies.

Today you work on a new song that you wrote the night before after leaving Rachel's house. You spent all night writing it and you even wrote the music so Puck and Finn could follow along without trouble. They can sense your anger because the first time you sung it you almost broke your mic stand. Now with your manager there, Brittany, you try to reign it in but the closer you get to the end of the song you start moving the same way, pulling the mic off the stand and pushing the standing away. You jump and trash your head back and forth, your short jagged faded pink hair swings around.

"And we lay, we lay together just not too close too close."

"How close is close enough?" Finn and Puck have learned the words rather quickly.

"I just wanna break you down so badly...well I trip over everything you say...well I just wanna break you down so badly. In the worst way!"

As the guys repeat your words you stop and stand there watching the car that just went by your house, Rachel driving in the direction of Santana and Santana's mom's car is right behind her. You shake your head.

"I'm gonna make damn sure that you can't ever leave. No you won't ever get to far me, you won't too far from me."

As the song goes on you start getting back into the rhythm with Puck who has joined you through out the last bit of the song, you like the rework, and Finn and slamming harder on the drums making the feeling better. More real. Finn finally stops playing, quieting down as Puck strums out the last few chords lightly.

"That song is so awesome Q."

"Hell yeah Quinn."

Finn stands up walking over to you all, sitting in the closer chair. Puck pulls his shirt over his head and sits on the couch grabbing a bottle of beer from the cooler leaning back. You collapse back in the recliner and then look at Brittany who sits in your lap.

"You're so sad Quinn."

You stare at her, "What are you talking about?"

"That song. I know why you wrote it." She puts her fingers in your hair and kisses you gently.

You sigh, "I'm fine Britt."

"No way dude. You're so depressing it's starting to harsh my mellow." Puck stares at you.

Finn nods, "I use to be bummed over Rachel and Santana too but ya know I eventually got over it."

You look at Finn, it's true he did eventually get over it. Maybe a month or so ago when you introduced him to your stalker Harmony and they clicked. Yeah she's a junior and he just graduated but you needed to get rid of the Rachel clone and a depressed Finn mean's band practice ends with Puck trying to attack him.

"Dude you need to get laid." Puck starts tuning his guitar, "We have a gig tonight. You will get laid there."

You sigh looking at the ceiling, "Get out my garage."

When no one leaves you just groan and Brittany looks at you.

"Guys, go inside."

They take the cue and go to probably raid your kitchen since your mom isn't home.

Brittany looks at you, "Wanna tell me about it?" She starts playing with your hair.

"I slept with Rachel...she gave me her virginity."

Brittany nods looking at you like she understands and you don't begin to comprehend how she gets it. You still give her the story from the last two days and you feel so tired. Exhausted. Drained. She kisses you and you return the kiss just as deeply. You have no romantic connection with Brittany but she likes to kiss you because she thinks it makes you happy. It just makes you feel wanted and loved. When Brittany breaks the kiss she looks in your eyes.

"Why do you love her so much? She hurts you Quinn. She used you. You can't be that stupid."

You stare at her, "I'm not stupid. I'm just in love."

"Are you?" Brittany smiles kissing you again, "Being in love makes you stupid. It's okay though because one day it'll make you smart."

She gets off your lap and goes into the house, probably to raid your fridge with the boys. You sit there taking out your phone, it had been vibrating since Brittany was in your lap. You stare at the screen and it starts again, your heart is aching just like your body.

_'You look so good performing.'_

_'It drives me wild.' _

_'I just want to watch you perform all the time...' _

_'Naked.' _

You groan and make a phone call. The phone rings longer and longer until you finally hear her soft innocent voice.

"Hey there."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Messing with my head."

"I don't mess with your head." You can hear the innocence in her voice.

You frown, "So sexting is normal."

"What?" You hear clicking and then a loud groan, "Santana! I told you not to touch my fucking phone!"

It hangs up and you stare at the phone before walking into the house and going into the kitchen watching Puck and Finn pig out over tons of left overs put on the table. Multiple sandwiches made with the roast beef from last night and other things they were probably eating cold.

"You guys make me sick." You sit at the table.

Puck smirks, "You're mom is a great cook."

"The best dude."

This is probably your favorite part of hanging out with guys. They know you're in a fucked mood and the way they help you is by eating all your food, telling you to get laid, and probably playing video games. But you only play video games with Mike because Puck and Finn get way too serious. You sit there as Puck and Finn argue about what they would be wearing that night. Brittany on the other hand is completely quiet because she's the manager and they're opinions don't matter when she has any kind of power.

"Stop talking. You're wearing plaid. Like when we did that song 'Sing' with Sue." Brittany smiles, "Now come on Quinn needs to rest and we need to buy flannel."

She walks out and makes them follow her ignoring all their protest. You smile as she winks at you then closes the door. Brittany is a great friend, you wish you could just be in love with her and get all this over with but it's not gonna happen. She think you're royally fucked up and she says she doesn't need all that baggage. You guess you understand though you were very offended when she first said that but by the fifth time you drunkenly expressed your desires she just patted you on the head and put you go to bed.

You lie on the couch and stare up at the ceiling with your mind running a million miles a minute. You wish you could just shut everything down. Stop it all before you go crazy. But you won't. The door opens and you close your eyes immediately, maybe it's your mom or Brittany but you really don't want to be bothered.

"Blondie."

You open one eye, "Santana?"

"The one and only. You need to lock your door." She closes it and walks over sitting in the recliner.

You close your eyes, "Why are you in my house?"

"You're in love with my girlfriend."

"Yeah, pretty much."

"She used you."

You look at her, "I know that!"

She flinches but holds her eye contact with you, you can see her confidence has been shaken something terrible and it's not by you. Her eyes are not as mischievous as they once were they look almost hidden behind whatever pain she has. You choose to ignore this, if she's not going to tell you then you aren't going to force it out of her.

"Why won't you go away?"

You look at her, "What are you talking about?"

"Why won't you go the fuck away Quinn?"

You stand up and so does she, automatically on the defensive. You shake your head and walk over standing in front of her putting your hands on her shoulders, gripping to pushing her to the door. This is when you notice her eyes are glazing over as she stares at you standing in front of her directly. Her eyes land on your hands and you stop at the door leaning in to open it, your bodies are closer now. She looks at you and kisses you causing you to move back and stare at her.

"Quinn." She breaths against your lips and starts kissing along the colume of your neck.

You stiffen, "What are you doing? Is this another fucking game?"

She shakes her head and starts kissing you, you push her away changing positions and you pin her against the door by her shoulders. When she moans you remember she likes this so you let go and put a hand in your hair.

"Santana get out."

You hold eye contact with her until she walks up to kissing you again and this time you give in. You let her lead you over to the couch and push you back. You let her kiss your neck and rip open your white American Eagle button down. You put her hands on her waist and go under her skirt with such ease you should be ashamed, but you're not. When she looks at you, you see nothing. You see your former best friend ready to give herself to you. Just like her girlfriend did. You need to make her leave. You need for her to get off you and get out. But she's taking off her shirt and you know she's not going anywhere. No...Puck was wrong, you didn't need to get laid. Because every time you get laid you can hear Satan laughing in your ear.

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Mmisery : Hell I hope this helped with your wondering

Ms. Chole: Thanks (not lame!)

lightblue-Nymphadora : Hope you're still enjoying it

Cassicio: You get it! Thank Jesus. I should just put your review in every chapter. Breaks it down so nicely.


	5. Dead

AN: Reviews will be answered at the bottom or in the story. I would message y'all but I don't really do that unless I'm on tumblr. Anything like suggestions you wanna make or if you just wanna talk you can message me on there. Like I'll reply to messages on here but it takes longer cause I never check for them. Not cause I'm rude but because I forget that FF has messages. But here is my tumblr

fanaticfaberryfanfiction(dot)tumblr(dot)com

Words: 1, 632 words without AN and answer reviews. Hope you enjoy.

0000

You made a mistake. A huge mistake. You had sex with Quinn Fabray. On her couch under a picture of Jesus. You'll be saying hail mary's for life. And you're not sure if you're Catholic or if they believe in Jesus, you asked Rachel once and she just stared at you and yelled 'I'M JEWISH!', but you can bet a million dollars that you don't have even they would frown down on what you just did. You came and made eye contact with Jesus 'The Son of God' Christ. Right in the middle of your inner hail mary rant you realize Quinn is crying into the tatthered remains of her preppy shirt. It startles you so you sit back down on the couch placing a hand on her back. You've never enjoyed seeing Quinn cry, she looks weak and she's not.

"Quinn?"

"What's wrong with me?"

"So much." Your attempt at a poorly timed joke.

She glares and you guess it's not funny, "Why do I keep getting into shit like this? With Rachel. With you. I've gotten virginity, pregnant, commited a sin on my mothers picture of Jesus, and mono."

"Let the mono go!" You roll your eyes, you're sick of hearing about fucking mono.

"Get out."

"Okay, wait, I'm sorry. I'll be a friend."

She stares at you, even as a friend you weren't really one. Just kind of. Barely.

"I blame you."

You stare, "Me?"

"I slept with Puck because you called me fat, I got mono because you were a closet case hell bent on making everyone else miserable, and then for some dumb reason you were okay with me being Rachel's first and now this! I push you and you're ready to cream yourself." She looks exhausted.

You don't know what to say so you get up, slip into your shoes and grab your keys.

"I wish I could be cold like you." You stop at her words, "I wish I could walk away from this fucking up triangle and feel nothing."

That hurt. You keep walking and leave. You ignore her calling your name and go to your car. Once inside you look up seeing her at the door fixing her shorts. As you start the car she jumps off the porch like a freaking cat and you quickly pull out the driveway. You leave her standing there calling out your name. This is when you feel the tears start to burn your eyes and warm your face.

S

When you get home you crawl into bed and cover your body with the sheet. You're glad no one is here right now, you just want to die. You made a mistake. You're dad is right, you are a fuck that can't do anything right. Your phone rings and you stare at Quinn's name until it shows missed call. You know she feels bad but you don't wanna talk to you. Not anymore. Not today. It feels like she kicked your chest in. You couldn't walk away if you wanted. This triabgle, this mess you created. This mess you agreed to in an emotional drunk rage.

It was one of those nights when the mood was right and you wanted to get trashed. So you and Mike stayed at his house drinking everything that had a proof. Mike was and is a lightweight so after one too many calls to Tina, her and Rachel came to end the party. Rachel, displaying what you call midget strength, carried you to your car and took the keys. She started driving to her house, her dads are never home, and bitching you about drinking until you lost it.

"_Why won't you let me be your first?"_

"_You're drunk."_

"_Yeah! And you wanna fuck Quinn?" _

Her silence was all you needed to cry yourself into a black out. The next morning you told her to do it. The next day she did. And today, today you wish you were dead.

S

You wake up to ten missed calls from Quinn, 35 text messages, and 5 voicemails. You delete everything and sit up seeing Mike in the floor watching TV.

"Hey."

He looks at you, "Your brother let me in before he left."

"Oh."

"Wanna talk about it?"

"About what?"

"Why Quinn has been calling since I got here? Or why Rachel isn't here? OR why you look like shit?"

He walks into the bathroom unaffeccted by your glare, he;s surprisingly your best friend. A lot of people guess it would still be Britt but she says you broke her heart (and you did when you decided to be with Rachel), or one of the gays but you only shop with them, and some assume it's Puck or Wheezy but it's not. Puck annoys you, for the life of you you can't figure out when Quinn would start a band with him. And Mercedes is always with Sam. You click with Mike, he doesn't judge and you don't scare him. He tells you that you look like shit and you go all Lima Heights because you have rage.

Mike comes back throwing a wash clotch at you, "Made a choice yet?" He lies across the bed.

"I choose to ignore you." You put the warm rag on your face.

He smiles, "Your phone talks when you don't answer text."

"So?"

"So, this is just me talking, but it sounds like you and Quinn got busy and she hurt your feelings so she's apologizing like crazy."

You stay silent.

"Thought so." He sits up, "And Rachel isn't here because?"

"I don't know know." Your voice is barely above a whisper.

Mike nods, "Talk to me. Now."

You nod slowly and start from you being a drunken mess to you being a cold bitch to you now feeling hollow. By the end tears are streaming down your face and you're pretty sure you've ruined Mike's shirt.

"Calm down S. What the hell have you been doing?"

You don't answer because you don't know.

"I've always considered you smart. Even when I learned about you and Rachel's...preference. I figured you knew what you were doing. But Jesus, why did you tell her do it?"

You still dont speak. You don't know. You're an idiot. Maybe you hoped she wouldn't do it. Maybe you hoped she would be offended and refuse to do it. Maybe you hoped your love would be enough to satisfy her desire for a perfect first time. You really don't know.

"San, are you in there?"

You look at him intently, trying to speak but nothing comes out. Are you here? Were you ever? It hurts. The pain of not knowing a fucking thing. You just sit there and he pulls you into another hug and you feel yourself exhale and feel a lot better. A lot better than you did earlier. Than you did three days. And all you needed was a hug from Mike. A big hug.

The basement door opens and you look up seeing tan legs walking down the steps and you move away from Mike. Mike looks over at Rachel, you can tell he doesn't see her the same. He looks at you and you kiss him on the cheek softly giving him the signal that it's okay to leave. He gets out the bed and goes out the basement door, not acknowledging Rachel in the slightest. Rachel walks up and gets into the bed pulling her shoes off. You lie back, you don't want to talk to her because you'll have to tell her. You could lose her. Would she leave you? She lies back and cuddles into you, her fingers playing with your ribs.

"Rachel, I had sex with Quinn."

She nods, "Yeah. I know."

"You know?"

Rachel leans up kising you, "It's okay. I don't wanna lose you. We all make mistakes."

"How can you so easily forgive me?"

She shrugs kissing you again, "Because I love you."

"And Quinn?"

"What about her?"

You're finding this hard to believe. This is the same girl that almost ripped your heart out for kissing Brittany goodbye. And this time you had sex. You look in her eyes.

"Rachel, where were you?"

She doesn't speak but looks away. You grab her face turning her to look at you.

"Rachel, where were you?"

"With Quinn."

You let go and look at her, you want to know what she's been doing but you can already guess. She looks guilty, too guilty for it to just be sex. You lean in close and move your thumb over her bottom lip and press your nose against her hair. She smells like vanilla, like Quinn, you move and kiss her lips really tasting her and she taste like honey, Quinn's chapstick. You move and look at her, still studying her face and neck. No she didn't have sex with Quinn. And it kinda hurts, there is something more intimate about her kissing Quinn. You know because Quinn is soft, her lips make you feel like you're falling in love, and her hands in your hair...you almost groan at the memory then look at Rachel. You look at her and she looks back at you. What can you say here? You're just as wrong as she is. Maybe no one is wrong. Maybe you opened this pandora's box. Maybe you deserve everything you get. Everything you've gotten.

The next morning you told her to do it. The next day she did. And today, today you wish you were dead.

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artsynaut: I hope you enjoyed

Mmisery: My plan is to confuse the fuck outta you guys =]

MsChloeMa: I love touchy feely quinn based feelings

Shin0: It's after graduation. The summer when Rachel gets back after visiting NYADA

BloodAuthor: Original intended end game Faberry. Now it's kind of a toss up.

PetMyKitty: It was change to Rachel mainly because endgame may have changed. But they're are plenty of stories that have heavy interactions of rachel with others before Faberry happens. Either way, no matter how the end game happens, it's gonna be chopped full of pezberry before it gets to whatever the endgame is.

Second the kink is not a disease here. There is no reason behind it. It will be explained as to why both girls like it. But no one was abused and it's not the same and child porn. They're adults who like it a little rough. They enjoy it. They have safe words and they have "Regular" interactions without the violence.

Quinn is in the middle of her own thing. She knows she shouldn't be doing this but she's in love and love is the real disease here. Love is the real fucked up game. Love can make you doubt, hate, fight, cry, and push away love until you realize it's just love. But I hope you do enjoy the story.

Fate-187: Thank you

Snowdrop1026: QUinn is going crazy.

ThekatFL: It just gets darker

Cassicio: Brittany, in my head cannon, is on some boss shit.

And those are the reviews. Thank you for the reviews I love them all. Seriously I do.


	6. Weep little lion Quinn

AN: Reviews will be answered at the bottom or in the story...if I can remember where I left off at. Anyway here is the last chapter. Tumblr link...

fanaticfaberryfanfiction

Trigger warnings, kinda dark. Not too dark, but hey I think this story is kinda light footed compared to what I originally wanted. But FF would take that story down. No joke.

Words: 2,512 words AN

0000

You can freely admit that you're pissed. You can freely admit that you want to punch something. But you can't freely admit that you're fucking scared. So you walk, you walk far, leaving your car with Santana because driving in anger gets people killed. You need to crack the source, but the source is with Santana cuddled up in her bed. So you walk up Quinn's driveway and knock on the door. Judy opens the door and lets you in. The woman is oblivious.

"Mike, it's always a pleasure. Quinn is in her room playing that damn music." She smiles good naturedly.

You go up the steps as she walks out. Standing outside her door you listen to the music and vacuum running, for as long as you've know Quinn you know she doesn't clean. You knock and the music is turned up louder. You knock again, no response.

"It's Mike." No response, "Quinn?"

Nothing,

"Quinn?" You twist the knob, the door is locked.

You feel sick as you kick the door in, it happens so fast you're barely breathing.

"Jesus Christ."

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Brittany 

You're hurt. The troubled love of your life is lying in a hospital bed. Bandages cover her forearms. You're pissed because she was gonna leave you before you could tell her. It gets hard competing with Rachel, even harder with Santana. You don't understand. But you've decided no on could come in. You agreed with the doctor's rule about no family so you won't let anyone in. Judy agreed. She didn't want to see Quinn so close to death...not yet. Not again. So you sit with her and play with her fingers.

"Brittany?"

"Quinn?" You looked at her.

She smiles sadly, "Hi."

You stare at her and lean up smacking her in the head.

"You're selfish." You hit her again.

"Brittany. Stop."

You stare hitting her again, "Selfish. Why did you do it?"

"It was easy?"

You slump in your chair and close your eyes.

"So easy."

"What about your mom?"

"Do you see her in here?"

"Beth?"

"She has a mom."

You open your eyes, "Me?"

You watch her make eye contact. You move your chair closer and take her hand. Quinn smiles giving you a teary eyed gaze. Your eyes land on her wrist, and your heartbreaks. You lean down kissing the bandage.

0000

Mike 

You sit outside, the blood stains your shirt. The look of blood in her floor haunts you every time you blink. So does the song. The fucking song.

_'Weep little lion man, you're not as brave as you were from the start.'_

You can't stop shaking, then you smell a familiar brand of cigarettes.

"Santana?"

"Shit!" She looks at you, "What are you doing here?"

You shrug, "Hiding."

She sits down and takes your hand, your heart pounds.

"How is she?"

You shrug, "Brittany has the room on lock down."

"It's my fault, isn't it?"

You don't have the heart to tell her the truth. You watch her, her hands are shaking so bad she's dropped her cigarette. You decide to hold her when she breaks down trying to pick it up. She's scared. You know why. Because it's time for someone to make a choice. And no one is going to be happy. You rub the back of her head until she's quiet. She slowly scoots away.

"I'm gonna go see if Brittany will let me in."

She walks away. You watch. Pained.

"You're in love with her."

You look up, "What?"

"You're in love with her."

"Go away Rachel."

She sits down.

"You love her."

You don't say anything and she looks at you.

"It's so hard."

"Your fault."

"...I know."

You want to hate her but you can't. She looks...so broke. The bruises make her look worse. So you hold her as she cries. She clings to you. So desperately. You could get use to this. But you really hope you don't. Being the shoulder is deconstructing your soul. What little you have left.

0000

Brittany

You stare at Santana and walk out the room, closing the door. You frown at the pain in her eyes.

"No."

"Brittany...I have to. It's my fault."

You nod, "And Rachel's."

She slides down against the wall and you sit beside her. Watching her pull her knees to her chest.

"I...just wanted to know what made Quinn so fucking special...every time she touched me...I..."

You stare, "Santana."

"Yeah?"

"I'm going to be blunt."

"Okay."

"You three are messed up. You love Rachel, right?"

She nods.

"Then why did you let Quinn be her first? Why didn't you stop it?"

She just stares, it's killing you. Santana is shaking, she looks sick, hurt, and you wonder when she last ate something.

"You can't keep trying to keep everyone happy. It's not fucking working."

You don't mean to snap but Quinn...she tried...what she tried...and it was Santana's fault. Rachel's fault. Quinn's fault. It's even your fault. Because she was drowning and you didn't save her.

"You can't come in. I love her, and I won't let you hurt her again."

You stand and go back the room, you try to be strong but it's hard with Santana begging through her tears.

0000

Rachel

The first time you realize you liked it rough you were 16, it was summer and you spent the months in Hawaii with your parents. You met a girl on the beach and got drunk. You started to make out then she bit your bottom lip, she bit so hard she drew blood. You remember whimpering, not from the pain but the pleasure. The entire summer you met her in the same spot pushing those limits.

Once you asked why it felt so good and she bit your neck whispering,

"_Because it's bad and dirty and wrong. You don't want me. You want to hurt, you want me to hurt you so good and so deep. So bad."_

_ ever_ since you accepted it. But once summer over you were back with Finn, and his hands, his slobbering kisses. You were dating him out fear. Fear someone would learn your secret. You were no longer on the island. People here were not accepting. Then you stared to notice Santana, the way she controlled. It drove, no it drives, you wild. So you started to intentionally bump her, annoy her, and found creative reason to end up pinned against the closest flat surface. Kurt said it was just deposits into your spank bank, he knew your secret because he has the same secret. Because he and Blaine did the same thing just a little bit more secretive about it.

Some days you still wish to know why Santana likes it. She won't tell you, she says it's personal. The strange thing is you actually believe it's that personal. Not like some dark, hidden secret. Just personal.

Other days you wonder if she really likes it. You asked and she just said she loved you. Part of you know sh does this for you, you just like to play stupid. You don't deserve her. You've managed to lose control, you were given the choice, you've never had choices before. Your fathers put you on the stepping stones of Broadway before you knew what it was. Now it's all you can do...but maybe that will change. But you've never had a choice. Santana gives you a choice and you almost kill Quinn. You can almost feel the heat of flames tickling your neck.

"Rachel."

You look at Santana standing there as beautiful as always. But her eyes are haunted, circled by darkness. Her spirit is broken. You start to wonder when she last ate as she sits beside. Taking Mike's seat, you're not sure when he left.

"How is she?"

She shrugs, "Brittany is running interference."

"I can try."

"No, she won't even consider letting you in."

You understand, she's so in love with Quinn, you're surprised that she didn't step in sooner. It's obvious, to you, that she's love with Quinn. They would be magical together, Brittany can give Quinn back what you so violently took. Her innocence.

Santana's stomach growling catches you attention.

"When did you last eat?"

"I'm not hungry."

You stand, "Come on."

"Rachel..."

"Now."

She comes to your side and you take her hand walking over to the car.

"I love you Santana."

"Thank you."

She breaks your heart because you swear, to whoever is listening, that this is the first time she honestly believe you.

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Quinn

"_I really fucked it up this time, didn't I my dear." _

You stare the ceiling, your arm around Brittany. You didn't want her to stay but it's hard to tell Brittany no. So she sleeps, her head against your chest, your fingers in her hair. You've never had this kind of intimacy with anyone. God, you wished she could love you. Because you can easily fall in love with her, you think you are.

She takes a hold of your waist and then laces your fingers. She's so gentle. You like gentle.

"No you didn't."

"I didn't what?"

She looks at you, "Fuck in up, you're not perfect but you don't fuck."

"I gotta say you're wrong there."

She stares off messing with the bandage, you've never seen Brittany so serious. But you watch her the way her picture watched you as you dug the cold razor into your warm flesh. You know she's so upset with you. You kiss the top of her head.

"I'm fucked up."

Brittany holds you tighter, "Yes but you are but you are stunningly perfectly."

You relax into her and the tears roll down you cheek. Because this is what love feels like. And you know because the stabbing pain in your heart is gone. So you silently thank God that you survived.

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Judy

It's 3 in the morning when Brittany leaves. It's 3:30 when Santana comes to stare outside the door, but never goes in. When Rachel comes, it's four in the morning, she takes Santana home. Four hours later Puck and Finn drop off band shirts, at ten the glee kids come sing, and at 11 you finally go to her door. You listen to her cry in, what you presume, is her pillow because it's so muffled. You don't know why she's so sad. Walking over you sit in the chair and she looks up.

"Mommy?"

Heart break feels like this, "Lucy..."

"Where were you?"

and this, "I couldn't...Lucy...you were almost dead...again. I was so scared...why?"

This time she stares at you and sits up.

"I don't care that your a lesbian, I don't care if this about a girl, you're my little girl and I wanna know why I almost lost you."

She stares longer, cries harder, and exhales scooting over. You get in the bed and she leans on you. You haven't held your little girl since she Lucy. She's always gonna be your Lucy, even if after her nose job she insisted you stopped but you just appease her and call her Quinn around guest.

"I'll start from the first time I asked about the bruises."

So you listen. The shock hits first the detail she shares makes you blush. You want to question why no one's parents had stepped in by now and called a stop to the shit. You immediately want to lock Lucy in a harm and buy a new couch. Some moments you want to laugh at her self deprecating humor because she's so sure she's going to hell. You've stopped telling her she's not, she gets annoyed when you did.

"And I just want to leave and never look back."

You look at her, "Okay."

"What?"

"You're going to Yale, I have no reason to stay her, let's move to Connecticut."

She's looking at you like you're crazy. And you are. You need to protect your baby, you've failed so many times and you refuse to do it again. Lucy is like your cub and you're her mother lioness. And it's time to go before you start ripping teen lesbians the fuck apart.

"Okay." She looks at her hands, "Okay."

You kiss her temple. "It'll be okay Lucy."

0000

Quinn

The scars of love heal, your wrist don't look bad, your heart has stopped breaking, and you breathe a little better. You haven't been back to Lima since you went to school. You didn't let your mother move. It was good idea but she has friends. And you have commitments. Like a band and you have a lot of summer gigs. And a certain blond that Skype with you on a nightly basis, you sleep on Skype. You now stand in the train station with your headphones on and two bags. You didn't bring everything, you got an apartment and you have a roommate, people who don't stare at your scars like you're a freak. You want Brittany to come back with you.

You didn't see Rachel or Santana much after you left. You think you saw glimpses of them on the side walk, you know you did, but they kept walking and you just turned your head hiding behind your jaggedly faded pink hair. You liked it that way. You like that way.

Your eyes scan and you smile when the girl of your dreams runs toward you and hugs you tightly, kissing you all over your face, and then nuzzles into your neck. You smile because she still smells like ice cream and strawberry sprinkles.

"I missed you babe."

"I missed you too Lucy."

She calls you Lucy now, she loves that name. And when your mom started calling you Lucy around her she immediately started. You like when she says it. As you hold her you see something that makes the world stop. A five-foot nothing brunette and a Latina girl carrying their bags across the platform. They both stop and look at you. You look at them. And you get the sick feeling it's going to happen all over again.

"I love you Lucy."

"I love you Britt...I love you."

All over again.

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AN: The end. =] Fierce baby. Fierce.

I'm gonna post another chapter answering reviews. Hope you liked it.


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